Posion and Wine
by thebadwitch13
Summary: "If someone told you two months ago that Derek Venturi was going to be your savior, you would have died laughing"
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing

"Your mouth is poison, your mouth is wine  
>You think your dreams are the same as mine<br>I don't love you but I always will"

-The Civil Wars

Your roommate seemed nice.

Until she slept her way through the football team, your eyes bleeding from walking in on her one too many times.

Your calls to Paul are becoming daily.

You missed your bed, your desk, the smell of pancakes wafting from downstairs, the sound of Marti's laughter ringing in your ears.

At least you still had your classes (studying never changes) and dancing (going for that Minor was the best decision you've ever made) and you still had Him.

(If someone told you two months ago that Derek Venturi was going to be your savior, you would have died laughing.)

* * *

><p>You met by accident, your coffee burning your tongue as you sputtered,<p>

"_What are you doing here?"_

Because really, what was he doing in, of all places,_ the library_.

(he knew this was your Kingdom, Land of Keeners, where Derek Never Dares To Tread)

Did hell freeze over? Was the world ending and you missed it?

"_Calm down Princess. I work here."_

"…_you what?"_

You laughed… because really, how hilarious was the idea of Him working Here - then you saw the glint in his dark eyes and you stopped laughing. You stopped breathing.

He sent you that smirk-

-and god, it was like you hadn't spent the past three weeks avoiding each other, like you never left high school, and for a minute something clicked into place and damn him, damn him for feeling like home.

Still smirking, he told you how much extra time he had by working here, how his boss loved him, how the lady library keeners loved him, and you seriously contemplated stabbing him in the neck with your pen.

(You didn't. You should have).

And then it was like he was Everywhere.

The library. The coffee shop. The cafeteria. The gym.

When you found him in your dorm room, on your laptop, on your bed, idly watching your movies, it was all you could do from screaming.

But then sent you that smirk-

"_Miss me Case? I brought those books you reserved."_

And sure enough, your research books lay on your desk, with what looked like a double-espresso caramel coffee next to it.

And you definitely didn't smile. Or let him stay. Or end up ordering Chinese, squealing as you hit him with your pillows for stealing your dumplings.

No.

You didn't do that at all.

* * *

><p>"<em>Oh, that's just Derek. Ignore him."<em>

It didn't hit you for another two weeks that you stopped introducing him as your brother.

Or as your step-brother.

He was just Derek.

It didn't hit you until That Night that he stopped introducing you as his sister, or step-sib, or anything other than _Casey_.

Your roommate dragged you out, claiming that you had to support her in Her Time of Need ( her newest boy-toy dropped her for that redhead in Spanish) and you found yourself at your first college party, complete with Keg of Beer, Jungle Juice, Jell-O shots, Sex on the Beach, and many, many other drinks you couldn't identify.

You hated it.

( It reminded you of black hair and fencing classes and Icky certain cousins)

Then you saw Him.

Leaning against the wall, casually sipping, dear lord, _water_, he watched the drunken escapades with a tired smirk.

And he was alone. No blonde hanging off of his arm. Or those yelling Neanderthal hockey friends surrounding him.

Something was terribly wrong.

**Ah! My first Life with Derek fic! I recently remember my great love for this show, and the pull was too much. Reviewers receive hugs and cupcakes.**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

"Your hands can heal, your hands can bruise.

I don't have choice, but I still choose you"

-"Poison and Wine" The Civil Wars

Karma could be a real bitch.

The first day at Queens, all those months ago, you honestly thought it wouldn't be that bad. You're Derek Venturi. You always get what you want.

Apparently not.

The Universe, laughing, decided to make your new roommate a Kenner. Math-loving, chess playing, pocket protecting, color coding Cody. And he was the good roommate (Later, he became Casey's best friend. But you're getting ahead of yourself.)

Your other roommate was…cool. The leather-jacket, the artfully messy hair, the good at-every-sport-and- art- kind- of- guy. Not to mention the smirk-oh, you just wanted to punch it off him.

Did you mention that your roommates were twins? Living with blonde twins had always been a dream of yours. Sham they're dudes.

" _Call me Zack."_ The American boy first said, as you maneuvered your flat screen (a graduation gift from Dad) into your dorm room. Young and naive, you thought he seemed chill.

Oh, if only you had known the truth.

Zackary Martin was going to steal your Crown.

But, hey, you won the Princess.

(Though if you told her that, she would slap you, muttering about feminism and the male dominating- blah-blah blah…you never did tell her she was hot when she was mad…yeah. Best keep that to yourself.)

* * *

><p>"<em>Hey. Does Zack live here?"<em>

The first day you realized that Life with Derek had turned into Life with Zack was when the hot redhead outside your door was not, in fact, waiting there for you.

After a while, you just stopped answering the door.

Hard to believe you thought at one point it would be great to finally live with someone who got you. A couple days into the semester, people joked that you and Zack were actually twins, and Cody was just your maid. See, Zack liked everything you liked- from movies to food to sports… hell; you even used the same hair products.

Then he started stealing all the girls. And you realized that Zack was the Evil Twin and the Enemy.

And you were not going to have another Truman.

* * *

><p>You made a preemptive strike- you got a job at the Library.<p>

"_What are you doing here?"_

Her first words to you in weeks and something in your chest relaxed and you could breathe again.

"_Calm down Princess. I work here."_

And you proceeded to ruin her Study Consolidation Method. You got paid to annoy Casey. Score.

As for the rest of it…well, what can you say? It wasn't stalking if you were family. You were just looking out for her, just like Dad told you to. Well, he maybe had said something along the lines of "_Try not to ignore Casey completely, O.K Derek_?" and handed you a fifty. So there you were. Not ignoring her in at the coffee shop and cafeteria and gym and her dorm room. Just following orders. If anyone's to blame, it was Dad.

Not to mention it meant getting away from your roommates. As long as you went to her dorm, she didn't go to yours. And she would never meet Them. Simple. Nothing would go wrong, right?

But you forgot about Karma and the Universe hating you.

Hence what happened at that party.

* * *

><p>You can still remember the smell of sweat and beer from the bodies pulsating and pushing around you, in a dance you knew all too well. Ah, the tender sights and sounds of Friday night.<p>

"_Who are you again?"_

You told that to her, that first day she moved into your life. A yet there you were, the King, now just a lowly stagecoach. Who are you indeed- more like, who the hell had you become?

Yeah. You were the designated driver.

Cody bailed on Zack, screaming something about how he was tired of being treated like the hired help, and if Zack wanted to go and act like a dunked imbecile, he could get someone else to drag his pathetic self home.

So that just left you, who didn't even want to go…in the end, Zack laid down cash.

Derek Venturi, getting paid to go to a kegger, and yes, those were flying pigs out the window.

You see… the whole party scene had kind of gotten old.

Shocking, right? Once upon a time, you were the King of Parties…but then again, you're also the King of Lies. So maybe your new label as the Responsible Friend was just another mask. It had nothing to do with that crushing _lovehatefearwant_ you got every time her blue eyes looked at you with disappointment. No. That had nothing to do with that at all.

Maybe you were-dear god-_growing up_.

…Nah. That would never happen.

So there you were, innocently sipping your water, trying to stay away from your roommate until you had to stuff him into the Prince-

And then you saw Her.

What the hell was Casey doing here? And what the hell was she wearing?

Dressed in some scrap of fabric, a poor excuse for a red dress, she looked like…like…

Damn it. It was Babe Rader all over again.

Well, you did what any self respecting friend would do. You were going take her the hell home.

"_Are you drinking water?"_

Her eyes wide with wonder, her first words stopped you cold.

"_It's_ _vodka." _

Because you were not going to let her find out you'd become a K-…. damn, it you were not a Keener, so what if getting hammed had lost its appeal and you worked in the library and you studied for tests( that was Cody's fault, the man made Casey look like a slacker).

"_Ah. So where are all your…friends_?"

She looked like she wanted to say "idiot hokey stick waving Neanderthals" instead of "friends". But you needed her gone now, so you didn't push it.

"_There around. The question is… what are you doing her_-"

"_Derek, my man! And who is this lovely lady?"_

And yes, that bright, smooth voice belonged to only one person.

Zack. And, damn it, he was looking sober; a sober Zack was a dangerous Zack.

Shit. You really didn't want him to meet-

"_I'm Casey, Derek's… um….who are you?"_

Slinging an arm around your shoulders, giving your Casey that stupid little smirk, he told her, "_I'm Zack. Zack Martin, Derek's roommate_."

…sometimes, you really hated your life.

**Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed! I love you all and will answer each one of you soon. And yes, I have crossed over Suite Life of Zack and Cody/Suite Life on Deck with Life with Derek. I just thought who better to give Derek a taste of his own medicine than Zack? I've fiddled with the timeline to make them all the same age. And I know my characterization of Zack seems shallow, but that's just because it's from Derek's perspective. Reviewers receive hugs and hot apple cider!**


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